Social Media: Whose World Is It?

Lately I've found myself in a number of conversations with parents discussing social networking/media, most often Facebook, and their involvement or participation in this still relatively new mode of communication.   I'm struck by the variety of opinions regarding how much involvement parents should have in what many perceive as their child's social world.   There appear to be three main camps parents fall in with regards to their position on social media.

• Nope:  Not interested in getting involved with Social Media, "It's not for me."


• On the Verge:  Would like to understand more, but don't know where to begin.


• Plunged:  Have made the leap and have a social media account and are either actively involved or slowly becoming more familiar with it.

I don't know that there is a "right" position to take, but before you take any position, it might be helpful to take a moment to look at social media separate and apart from being a parent and explore what social media is in general, how people are networking, where is it going and what that might mean.   As I write, the world of social media is evolving rapidly and a precise definition is a bit difficult to pin down.  There are many definitions for social media out there which try to explain it from specific angles from marketing to educational to personal.  For the purposes of this discussion and my focus on the everyday user I'll be addressing social media from a personal perspective as it relates to social networking.

What is Social Media?

In my opinion, social media could be defined simply as,

"Social Media:  Tools that assist us in engaging with a far greater number of individuals and groups than would otherwise be possible given traditional methods of social networking (i.e. school, church, special interest groups, etc.)."

In essence, it's where sociology meets technology and the synergy created by this pairing is growing providing an incredible amount of potential for us to connect with, interact with, share and learn from others.  And it's right here where I believe many of the "Nopes" and those "On The Verge" run into a stumbling block for two reasons.  First, if you don't have comfort level with technology jumping onto the bandwagon with yet another new application using a device you have not yet mastered might seem unappealing and not worth the effort.  Secondly, the exponential growth of the network and the vast number of people, products and services one may be networked with can be daunting.  Together these can make the thought of becoming involved in social media and growing a social network seem very unattractive, understandably.  That said, let's go back to what I said about social media - it allows us to connect with, interact with and learn from others.   In other words, it helps us create relationships with one another and it will - slash that - it is now becoming one of the most common ways in which we connect with one another.

How to People Use Social Media?

I could not name all of the social media sites currently being used, but suffice it to say that there are many and it's growing and changing too.  The most commonly mentioned sites are probably Facebook, LinkedIn and Twitter, and while those are robust in their user-ship the social media world is quickly redefining itself as the number of users grows.  More sites are being added, many are growing and others are losing ground all due in large part to the users who are helping define what is valuable.  To help us grasped what this bucket of social media sites looks like without naming them all let's break them down into some categories.

[caption id="attachment_130" align="aligncenter" width="372" caption="Social media categories with examples. Not intended to be a complete list."][/caption]

The graph below was presented by Amy Portfield in an article recently published by the Social Media Examiner in which a study of 1000 social media users wee surveyed to understand when, what and where they use social media.  The graph underscores a couple of things.  First, social networking sites attract different types of users. (Notice the absence of a "news" category for Myspace users where this is a predominate area of interest for users of other sites.)  People have a presence on certain sites because there can find and share information that interest them.  Second, it's not just about being social.  In fact, you might say that learning and sharing is just another way of being social because  I do find it interesting that there is not a "socializing" category anywhere  on this graph.



Source: Amy Porterfield,  "Study Highlights Growing Social Media Addiction" Social Examiner,  Web April, 16, 2010.

Does everyone who participates in social media have an account on all of these sites?   Certainly not!  Just like choosing where you shop, travel, socialize, eat, etc., individuals determine which sites are valuable to them based on their own interests and what they find meaningful.  Having a presence on at least one site, such as Facebook, LinkedIn or Twitter to get started, will allow you to connect with, interact with, share and learn from others.  And that is how relationships are built using social media.

As I've mentioned a number of times, social media is changing rapidly and weaving its way into our lives whether we like it or not.  It's a social phenomenon driven by tecchnology.  Think about it, the Facebook application was launched in 2004 and Twitter saw it's first Tweet in March of 2006.  Today if Facebook were a country it would be the third most populated (Techxav) at over 400 million while Twitter's population has grown to 27 million in just four short  years.  Compare that to the evolution of cell phones which also received a lot of initial resistance from users, do you recall?!   The first truly portable cell phone was released to the public by Motorola in 1983 and it took 12 years before the number of wireless subscribers reached only 28 million n 1995, whereas Facebook hit 100 million in four and half years.  And where did they announce this?  On Twitter which was only two years old at the time.   And remember texting?  Do you recall ever saying, "Texting?  I don't get it.  When would I need to use it?"   Now, we have laws in effect because people text too much and at the wrong times.  (One unfortunate side effect that accompanies rapid growth as seen with cell phones, texting and social media is the lag in establishing social mores and proper etiquette in how we incorporate such things into our lives.)  Today there are over a billion cell phone users and the majority have text-enabled phones.  I think it's safe to say that social media is here to stay and the number of users will only continue to climb.

What Does the of Social Media Look Like?

Big question!  Good question!  What we can be fairly confident of is that is will continue to grow and weave itself into our lives and we will become more connected because of it and maybe smarter as well.  Communicating with social media makes it so easy to share information with others and that's what people find valuable and meaningful.  And when there is valuable and meaningful information to be had people will remain connected.  I'll refer you to two articles that delve into answering this question and you may find of interest.

• Convergence: The Future of Social Media -  by Julian Hall


• Social Media in Higher Education:  McGraw-Hill Brings Together Social Media and Education Experts to Discuss the Future of Social Media in Higher Education

The first provides some insight as to why social media is here to stay specifically as it discusses how social media brings together the many aspects of our lives.   The second is important for parents to understand how social media will become an important tool for how children learn in school.    What also might be helpful is to understand how others like you are participating.  Here's a great link to social media demographics from Flowtown illustrating who is using social media which may provide some insight as to where you might want invest your energies.   What's interesting to see is that the age group most engaged in the popular social media sites are those 35-45 years of age which might be a surprise to many who associate social media only with young adults.

What Might All of This Mean to Me?

The answer may be different for all of us except for a few points that appear to be universal.

1. Social media isn't going away.


2. More and more of our lives will converge into the space of social media.


3. There are many benefits to be had being involved with social media, not the least of which is having a deeper connection to the world in which we live.


4. Want it all in a nutshell?  Here's a very short video portrayal by Erik Qualman of how far social media has penetrated our lives and tries to help you answer the question, "Is social media a fad or a revolution?".

Turning back to the original discussion of this blog which was about parents involvement social media?   The first thing that should be clear by now that the world of social media is not just a kid's world and it's certainly not just for socializing.  I would also add that, parent or not, there are many good arguments for at least dipping your toe into social media if you haven't already made the plunge.  If you think you're ready, here are ten things to consider that may be helpful as you think about getting started:

1. Safety/Security:  Social media is not unlike any other type of communication or interaction we have in the offline world. There, we take measures to be safe and to protect our valuables. Being online isn't any different.  We should be concerned with those very same things, it just may take a little more effort and patience to learn something new.  There are tools in place to provide you with the security you need and there are also some things you may need to learn too.  The information is out there, just ask.


2. Etiquette:  Social media as about relationships and while there may be some logistical bumps in the road as we learn to define what's appropriate and what's not in this online world, the golden rule still applies.  Treat others as you would like to be treated. Just like you wouldn't walk into a group of your son's classmates and show them pictures of him as a little boy on a toilet, you also wouldn't post those pictures on his Facebook Wall for all to see.  Yes, this has happened.


3. Quality Not Quantity:  You may see kids and even some adults try aggressively to ramp up their friends or followers.  To each his own.  I mean, when do you have enough?  There's no trophy when you get there, wherever "there" is.  The win is by engaging with people, groups and organizations that add value your life. How do you teach this to your children?   Lead by example!  Talk about what you've learned, what you've shared and how others have benefitted from their relationship with you.


4. Relationships:   As in the offline world and in life, people can benefit from and they can be hurt by their relationships with others.  So have discussions with your children about who they friend, why they friend them and who they should not friend. This is probably a good topic for another blog, but I do want to point out a few things here.
   
   
   
   • Kids and Adult Friends:  You may think having your kids "friend" family members is just fine, and for the most part it probably is. But, if there are cousins, aunts, uncles or any adult whose profiles have the potential of displaying information that may not be age-appropriate for your children, then you need to either discuss with your child why that may be okay and have them de-friend them or have a conversation with the adult and ask them to place the child on a limited profile.  This is a privacy feature on Facebook that provides the user of the account with flexibility when it comes to who is allowed to see certain portions of the users profile.  You can establish a limited profile for selected people and these individuals will never be informed that they are only viewing a selection of the features that are available on your profile.
   
   
   • Social Media Can be Good for Those at Risk:  The relationships established through social networking can be very supportive and have been found to be effective tool for suicide prevention.  According to the Defense Centers of Excellence (DCoE), social media is proving to be a relevant tool, not a passing fad, which is used to provide health information to support suicide prevention efforts.
   
   
   • Bullying:  While social media can be a very positive experience for most people, bullies still exist.  Does the venue make them any worse?  I don't know, but I do believe it may make them more visible.  In any event, it is our responsibility as parents to start conversations about bullying early with our kids and on some level monitor who their friends are.  And there's no better way to do this than sharing the social media experience with them while respecting their space, of course.
   
   
   
   


5. How to Begin?:  If you don't know where to start, then ask.  Ask me, ask friends or jump online because there are a variety of ways to learn how to begin.  (Hmm?  Maybe that should be another upcoming blog?)

My mission is to help others find more productive ways of doing things via technology and understand the capabilities that are available to them to help reduce stress of this chaotic world in which we live.  Social media is sometimes viewed as an interruption of sorts, rather than anything remotely productive.  The purpose of this blog was not to be an advocate for social media, but rather to provide some insight into social media and help others make more informed decisions about being an online social networker.  Whether you are a "Nope", an "On the Verge" or you've "Plunged", we can always learn something from each other, so please share this with someone you think might benefit from this blog.